An honor. Not a privilege.

“Our advice was to choose people who would support us during our marriage,” a friend said about how he and his fiance chose their groomsmen and bridesmaids.

Almost by instinct, people often choose people who they have known the longest. A friendship stemming from childhood—the preschool days. And rarely do they choose people they have met recently. But why bestow the honor to stand next to a friend at the altar when you have barely spoke in the last few years—because you’re involved in your own lives? Because you’re on the other side of the country? Because you have little in common anymore?

We often like to think that we are always there for people, to support them in every way. But like everybody else, I admit I falter too.

What is friendship when it’s only based on duration and not knowing that the support is there? To receive such an honor?

2 thoughts on “An honor. Not a privilege.

  1. I agree with you. Most of the weddings I’ve been in were people from college, and I still keep in touch with them. A few were from high school (but they were soon after high school). My friend from childhood I still keep in touch with, so I was in his wedding.

    But I agree with you… and your friend (who I may know)… it’s about whether they support you, not how long they’ve known you.

  2. Hmm good point.. but out a sense of extreme loyalty, I would 100% pick my cousin to be my MOH when(if) I get married even though we are not close at all anymore and only talk to each other at family gatherings now. But we grew up together and were at one time very close… and although we barely know each other anymore, there’s that sense of deep rooted connection!

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