Troubled, I decided to prick myself

Misinformed, I was preparing for my upcoming Thailand trip with the notion that I had already received all my vaccines.

Then last weekend, checking again…I was not. Horrified, I scheduled an appointment immediately thinking I would get the expensive last-minute shot. About an hour later, I walked out with two sore shoulders and a significantly lighter wallet.

Inside the clinic, I watched as a mother guided two boys to a cubicle where a RN was waiting. In few minutes, I heard them…cry and yelp. Tears almost came to my eyes recalling the moments when I was 5. When a big man decided to hurt me and then he still gave me a sticker that said “You’re so brave! You didn’t cry!”

I was crying. And the irony, the hypocrisy of the situation…that adults weren’t supposed to hurt you…the confusion of that day stuck with me. Although today, my intelligence told me that there are reasons why that happened. I never forgot.

As the RN gave me shots, I turned my head away almost as a reflex. She talked as she did it, not really giving me a warning. She knew I wouldn’t cry as I have built up a pain tolerance over the years. And intellectually, I knew it wasn’t torture.

But now, my shoulders are sore. I don’t have a sticker or candy. At least my fear of the unknown has subsided even though my credit card doesn’t feel the same.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *