I learned from the HBO show Curb Your Enthusiasm (produced and stars Larry David, creator of Seinfeld) that No Presents on a party invitation is a polite way of saying Bring a gift.

And I said so (with a bemused smile) when my dad showed me his coworker\’s 50th birthday party invitation. My parents rarely attend parties in the first place. As a result, my mom fretted around the house for 30 minutes looking for a present (a box of cookies!) while my dad insisted that the no-present rule be taken literally. In fact, my dad said that his coworker was probably being smart, having had bad experience in the past. BUT! Truth to be told, when I sent out my 21st birthday invite…I wrote no presents and the majority of the people who showed up bought something for me.

Are presents worth more than the presence?

Perhaps. Because my dad related to me today how a friend travelled all the way from Hong Kong…and gave us only a bag of peanuts from the plane. Surely if that memory stuck out, arriving without a present must at least be shocking.

Eventually, my parents left the house without a present.