{"id":4006,"date":"2012-07-10T23:57:23","date_gmt":"2012-07-11T06:57:23","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/of.jennism.com\/?p=4006"},"modified":"2012-07-11T00:01:29","modified_gmt":"2012-07-11T07:01:29","slug":"maybe-i-was-afraid-of-becoming-like-this","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/of.jennism.com\/?p=4006","title":{"rendered":"Maybe I was afraid of becoming like this"},"content":{"rendered":"

Shortly after I returned from my trip, I wrote<\/a> reasons about why I stayed.<\/p>\n

But now…almost 6 months later, it’s almost because I am afraid of becoming the self-absorbed New Yorker<\/a>. It’s unlikely that I will stumble around Brooklyn or Lower East Side drunk (it has never been my style). And it would be difficult to find me entangled in multiple love affairs.<\/p>\n

I just don’t want to become that person that says, “I can’t live anywhere else.”<\/p>\n

I don’t want to be the girl that lectured me on my third day in New York. Sitting in a dark trendy bar, my sister had gone to the restroom so suddenly there was this awkward space between her friend and me. Out of politeness, I made small talk\u00e2\u20ac\u201dwho are you, where are you from, maybe I am moving to New York…I don’t know<\/i>. But it was the last part, maybe I revealed a bit of self-doubt…whatever it was, suddenly for the next several minutes, she threw her hands up in the air. I felt like she was shaking me\u00e2\u20ac\u201dOF COURSE YOU WANT TO MOVE HERE. YOU BETTER MOVE HERE. THIS IS THE PERFECT TIME.<\/i><\/p>\n

It frightened me. I had opened a bit of myself and suddenly there was this new yorker who was telling me what she believed and what she believed that I should do. The emphasis on should<\/i>.<\/p>\n

I didn’t be her. I didn’t want to be the gossipy Upper East side locals that walked around with the New Jersey accent. I could tell that they were absolutely city folk\u00e2\u20ac\u201dsuburbs? pshaw! $10 for a gallon of milk? Absolutely!<\/p>\n

I could not do it. And even though I say right now that I don’t want to move from San Francisco, I know that I could. Purely right now, it’s because I live in a neighborhood where people I trust live. It’s because of familiarity. It’s because I actually unlike some San Franciscans…really do love the mild chilly weather. Maybe it’s because my family is across the bay. But in the end, really…it’s because I have lived here. So as a result, that’s why I can imagine myself right here. And I know that I can imagine myself elsewhere\u00e2\u20ac\u201dif I really wanted to.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Shortly after I returned from my trip, I wrote reasons about why I stayed. But now…almost 6 months later, it’s almost because I am afraid of becoming the self-absorbed New Yorker. It’s unlikely that I will stumble around Brooklyn or … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4006","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/of.jennism.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4006","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/of.jennism.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/of.jennism.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/of.jennism.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/of.jennism.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=4006"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/of.jennism.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4006\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4008,"href":"https:\/\/of.jennism.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4006\/revisions\/4008"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/of.jennism.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=4006"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/of.jennism.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=4006"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/of.jennism.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=4006"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}