Surrounded by people I didn’t know, I felt free suddenly to state my weaknesses bluntly and honestly. Despite my wavering voice, I didn’t hesitate in telling everyone about my anti-alcohol feelings, my odd no-touch no-huge zone. I was quite certain that my words reeked of my insecurity and anxiety.<\/p>\n
Yet, I was not that deathly afraid.<\/p>\n
See this contrast to a room full of people that I knew. Perhaps people that fell into my number two circle. These are the people that I consider close…but maybe not horribly too close. I would hesitate depending on the state of my relationship with them.<\/p>\n
Sometimes I would be the poseur\u00e2\u20ac\u201dto appear to be smarter and resourceful than I really was. Or I would feel guilty…needy…trying everything to avoid abandonment and be accepted.<\/p>\n
But in a room full of strangers, I have nothing to lose. They didn’t accept me prior to this moment. I don’t expect them to do so, because I am not seeking to accept them. At the very least, I just want to be heard for a single moment. After that, I really don’t care.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Surrounded by people I didn’t know, I felt free suddenly to state my weaknesses bluntly and honestly. Despite my wavering voice, I didn’t hesitate in telling everyone about my anti-alcohol feelings, my odd no-touch no-huge zone. I was quite certain … Continue reading