{"id":5179,"date":"2015-08-31T23:57:31","date_gmt":"2015-09-01T06:57:31","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/of.jennism.com\/?p=5179"},"modified":"2015-09-01T00:01:16","modified_gmt":"2015-09-01T07:01:16","slug":"but-then-we-can-eat-everyone-together","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/of.jennism.com\/?p=5179","title":{"rendered":"&#8220;But then we can eat everyone together!&#8221;"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Chris tells me this, without any pretension.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;I don&#8217;t know if I want to be a zombie,&#8221; I say.<\/p>\n<p>I have thought about this carefully.  That one day, I would want to sign a DNR order.  That in case of the zombie apocalypse, perhaps caused by a vegetarian type food like quinoa, I would prefer to survive.  And if bitten, I would rather die than to cause others the pain of my own bites.  Chris said that he would join me.  &#8220;Wouldn&#8217;t it be great if we were eating people together?&#8221; he says.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;But then I wouldn&#8217;t be myself,&#8221; I say, thinking of rotting skin and my mindless head, devoid of any of the Jennifer personality beyond the general weak constitution.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Okay,&#8221; he agrees.  &#8220;But just believe me when there are zombies.  Don&#8217;t disbelieve me like all those characters on TV and movies.  Believe me when I say that there are zombies.  We will need a safe word.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Okay.&#8221;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Chris tells me this, without any pretension. &#8220;I don&#8217;t know if I want to be a zombie,&#8221; I say. I have thought about this carefully. That one day, I would want to sign a DNR order. That in case of &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/of.jennism.com\/?p=5179\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5179","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/of.jennism.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5179","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/of.jennism.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/of.jennism.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/of.jennism.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/of.jennism.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=5179"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/of.jennism.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5179\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5182,"href":"https:\/\/of.jennism.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5179\/revisions\/5182"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/of.jennism.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=5179"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/of.jennism.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=5179"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/of.jennism.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=5179"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}