In the early 2000s, I told the world about what I thought about my roommate and boys. No filter. No censorship. I just wrote what was on mind, even if it was blatantly insulting or self-centered. (Back then, I didn’t quite embody the consideration that I would value in life.) Sure, there were times that it backfired\u00e2\u20ac\u201dlike my supervisor asking me to take down a post or a former roommate getting angry about my complaints about her demands. But overall, I was allowed to speak freely.<\/p>\n
And today is quite a different world.<\/p>\n
I have specific goals in mind. Some days, it’s to be a design thought leader. Perhaps some kind of TED speaker. Other days it’s to be a writer. A writer of a beloved novel. Whatever the case, the best path to success involves being spotlit in the public eye. The word matters and the intention behind that word matters.<\/p>\n
Today, I read about the terror of J.K. Rowling’s twitter feed<\/a>. She didn’t want to participate initially, but eventually pulled by its instant congratulations and ego rubbing, she couldn’t resist. In doing so, she alienated fans and disgraced her work.<\/p>\n All because of speaking freely.<\/p>\n How can I be the perfect person all the time? Especially when I am representing myself. And how I certainly don’t want a PR person representing me. I want to show the real me, all the time. And yet. I know how I should<\/i> portray myself, but is that who I want to be? To create an identity, almost like a brand where there are specific principles and structure to every decision, to every spoken word, and every action.<\/p>\n That’s not what I am. And no rules can capture every aspect of my personality or even its dark side.<\/p>\n When I talk about my recent trip abroad, I hesitate to speak badly of anyone or anything. Because I think, it’s not that I hated it, it’s that only I<\/i> hated it. The person who is me in that particular sense, so I feel almost constrained in what I say. I didn’t like it, but that doesn’t mean that you won’t like it.<\/i> That preface floats nearly in front of every sentence that drips from my lips.<\/p>\n But then when I say what I love? It’s easy to spill the beans. People love hearing that. Positivity is the essence of being human. But how can we be like that all the time? Without the darkness penetrating?<\/p>\n to be me is to be me. Whole, imperfect, and real.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" In the early 2000s, I told the world about what I thought about my roommate and boys. No filter. No censorship. I just wrote what was on mind, even if it was blatantly insulting or self-centered. (Back then, I didn’t … Continue reading