My nightmare wasn’t ever about someone I care about dying. Rather it was something…more sinister or just a greater personal fear of mine.<\/p>\n
It starts like this: I am going somewhere public. Whether it’s work with people I don’t really know. A public mall. Some gathering. As I look around, I realize that I am the only one masked. Am I supposed to be wearing my mask, I worry to myself. What are they thinking?<\/p>\n
But I resist because I had made decisions previously to mask and be safe. And yet, I am vaccinated and even with the confusing recommendations, I hesitate to go maskless.<\/p>\n
But then yesterday happened. In recent weeks, I have been a bit more looser about outdoor masking. The heat is one factor of course, but I have decided to accept the studies about outdoor activities\u00e2\u20ac\u201dit’s safe. So I let it go.<\/p>\n
But then with everything they say that going maskless indoors is fine. I am wary of course due to the increase of cases by the Delta variant.<\/p>\n
And with yesterday’s incident where Chris forgot his cloth mask and thus had to use my blue disposable mask, which broke shortly. I went maskless and it was like it was before. The Before. It felt uncomfortable, but normal. And yet I don’t know. I felt exposed. Not just to potential viruses and bacteria. But knowing that people see me, like really see me. I don’t want to be seen. Not until I actually want to be.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
My nightmare wasn’t ever about someone I care about dying. Rather it was something…more sinister or just a greater personal fear of mine. It starts like this: I am going somewhere public. Whether it’s work with people I don’t really … Continue reading