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Registries and gifts

I have always disliked the idea of gifts. I understand the intention, but people don’t understand me and get me things that I feel thankful for…but also abhor. I am not girly—so bath salts don’t do it for me. I am too local-centric that gift certificates would not do (and sometimes insult me). But whatever the case, I still really appreciate the thought.

But at the very most, presence > present.

I love it when someone shows up, talks to me, but especially talks to everyone else. The curiosity, the communication matters to me much more. or if they can’t make it, taking a rain check. That’s my kind of present.

Of course in this world where registries are so predominant, last year, I started becoming frustrated with the idea that registries are for life events that we are so expected to have.

So what about the single person registry as suggested on Sex and the City. Why do I dish out money for an engagement party, a bridal shower, a wedding, a baby shower, a kid’s birthday…etc etc. When those things may be far in the future for me or never happen.

I have birthdays of couse, but I always emphasize the presence and really want to say no presents. Although a thoughtfully written card is very welcome.

Then I did my kickstarter. I was surprised by all the amounts and all the friends that contributed. Could I really say—I can determine the strength of friendships based on the speed of contribution (depending on the friend’s financial flexibility, of course).

I wondered…is that my version of a gift registry? I don’t like the idea to be surrounded by things from Crate & Barrel or Macys. My taste is so eclectic and almost craigslist-driven (the journey of getting a piece matters more than the piece itself) that I couldn’t do it. I didn’t want to judge, but then the thought crossed my mind.

Do you want to celebrate with me…this ice cream travel guide…the same way you would celebrate a wedding, a birth, a house with me?

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