\”Friend.\” It\’s one of those words that have puzzled me for the longest time. So much that I wrote one of my best college papers on it.

\”Your friend never came by to pick up the futon,\” my dad said on my voice mail. Earlier, I had called home to tell him that someone had responded to my craigslist and that if she was going to pick up the futon, she was going to call the house phone number prior to arrival. However, my first response to the message was \”SHE IS NOT A FRIEND. HOW DARE YOU USE A SACRED LABEL TO DESCRIBE SOMEONE I DON\’T EVEN KNOW.\”

At the same time, to call someone \”not a friend\” could be the most painful insult ever. Last month, someone and I concluded that we were not friends. We were just people…who once considered each other as former friends…and that now we were nothing more than strangers who pass by each other in the street. Where are the times that we can easily introduce someone as an acquaintance? We just can\’t. Someone I met for a minute and am forced to introduce to other people, I may have to refer…as a friend. It\’s one of those labels that are not truly definite. Using the word \”friend\” to describe someone is so…contrived from social pressures. It never really matches the internal state of mind. It\’s easier to say \”my friend works at google\” than to say \”i know someone who works at google\”. To some, it\’s almost a privileged type of status.

But ultimately, to be a friend means that you get invited to a wedding and you get free food (although this is also a test of whether you can think of a good wedding gift).

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In other news, it really was scary driving home today. Personally, I prefer leaving Berkeley LATE so that there are no cars on the road. But instead I left at 9:30 pm and there were many. As I merged onto the freeway (in my brand new 2004 cactus-colored Toyota Corolla), cars began changing lanes, pulling away from a car in front of me. A white bmw. For some reason, this lane suddenly slowed down 30 mph. Usually it\’s around 50 mph in the tunnel. My first thought was that the car in front of me was having an engine problem. I grumbled, but I was reluctant to change lanes in the tunnel because I suck at driving like that. So I followed the white bmw through the tunnel. And worse of all, I noticed that it wavered in the lane, almost like it lost control of staying in its appropriate lane. Was the driver drunk? Get out of this situation as fast you can, Jenn. Two summers ago, I remember Seth saying People don\’t die easily when I was freaked out that a friend got into a car accident because he was one hour late. The bmw\’s brake lights went on once on the way out of the tunnel even though there were no obstacles around it. Bright red light spilled in the lane. Eventually, the space cleared and I drove past it as fast as I could. Just to get away.