I have never liked making promises I cannot keep. And it’s that time of the year again. A time to make resolutions that people often forget within a moment’s time.

And isn’t the biggest resolution always: lose weight

How cliched. To lose that 20. That 50. To be more happier? To be more healthy? There’s so many of us who wish to be thinner and slender because media tells us we should be. We spot that new commercial–we see the thin people happy and we see that they are having a great time with their new insurance. Our pursuit of happiness is defined by what others define as happiness. I don’t deny that I am caught in the same pattern.

And then there’s the thought of eating less. Eat nothing for a whole day. Then indulge yourself the next. Then a gym? No running because that will cause thick thighs. Perhaps sit ups. 10 should do, right? And then a month later, it’s forgotten. Myths and hopes.

But isn’t every day a progression in self-improvement? I have looked in the photos of myself in the last few years. When my sister’s high school reunion rolled around, you couldn’t help but think who gained weight? (she did notice her high school bully grew twice the size). You just didn’t want to be the one with that label. I am willing to admit that I wasn’t perfect.

So a few days ago when I heard “lose weight” as a new year’s resolution, I said almost immediately “but you’re not…” I realized how easily I overlook these things. What is the point of a resolution if you’re not happy with yourself first?

Last year, I mentally told myself to be less self-centered and more considerate of others. Still working on that.

But a line to describe my 2006: in every gray cloud, there is a silver lining.