When I was in the 7th grade, I was unhappy with the way my life was proceeding. It was only the previous year that I endured rampant teasing. I was the secret outcast that the teachers never knew as I quietly got A’s in my classes but failed miserably during lunch. As girls would gawk at me and whisper snide comments to their friends.
On the first day of school, everyone assembled for class. I saw a new girl. She was Asian. Normally in the nearly Caucasian community, I would dart over to her. I could pretend to be popular immediately. But I saw that she made instant friends. Why was she smiling? How did she find comrades so quickly? I shuffled to a seat in the auditorium and decided right then that I would do the same thing. The same goal.
To be charismatic and comfortable in social situations. To be confident. To walk into a room and not fear that I would enter an awkward conversation.
Plastic surgery? Never. But those c-words are what I am seeking.