Banishing the awkwardness

“And so she…” I would tell the story almost haltingly, but not as fluid as I could in writing. “And then she sent it off…”

People would laugh, but would they laugh out of politeness or because it was really funny? After thinking of the thousand avenues I could take, I decided to take an improv class starting tomorrow to improve my outward communication.

Strangely enough, I tested as a “PERFORMER” in a popular personality test. I do like being the center of attention, entertaining people. And it’s true, I can be with the right set of people. I do dominate sometimes with an aura.

But most of the time, in the company of strangers, I become quite the opposite—the wallflower. Even though instances, I dream of breaking out. Sometimes I do…when I feel a lot of positive energy growing in the room usually with the presence of alcohol. I may be the first one to dance. The first one to sing loudly and obnoxiously on the karaoke system. I have.

Last year during this time, I started writing my own comedy routine, wondering if I could make it to an open mic night. It veered left field out of my usual personality, but not only did I want to surprise people, I wanted to prove it to myself. I thought a lot of great jokes—but couldn’t think of the right delivery. An ex-boyfriend once said that I was one of the funniest people he knew. Other people have said that I have this mysterious aura, an allure of lyrical words…

I just hope I can vocalize it all.

I have dreamed about being a musician, a dancer, a comedian. It’s definitely not a dream job, but I want to do it once.

And so improv. Plus I want to have witty comebacks to pushy salesmen.

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