Outside on the deck overlooking San Francisco downtown at a rowdy house crawl party, I was making fun of my drunken Korean friend. Do you understand the words that are coming out my mouth? I asked in a shrill voice imitating Chris Tucker.

He laughed and asked whether there were any Korean girls around. I pointed to a faroff light in the downtown…there sir there is someone waiting for you! just move north a bit…

Suddenly another friend—a female—jumped in and started veering the conversation toward an unsavory topic. I backed away in disinterest (and disgust). But I stopped when she mentioned she asked the same question of someone I knew. That someone had fled when the question was asked.

In a sudden sobering moment of curiosity, I asked “Has he dated anyone in the last year?”

The conversation turned serious. She and I agreed that he didn’t try hard enough. He could have. We both said, “Yeah, he’s a good guy.”

My drunken Korean friend got bored because I wasn’t playing anymore and left us standing in the balcony. I told her about how he had tried almost 3 years ago, but I didn’t want to stay because it was too slow.

“What’s your name?” she asked.

“I am Jenn,” I said wondering if the name sparked a stream of gossip.

So we let the conversation flow a bit more. I turned to go back inside where more people were mixing drinks and talking. I ran into the person of discussion standing near the table covered with vodka, oranges, and drinks. He stood next to me and gave me a light playful shove.

“Hey, how are you doing?” I said and smiled.