Guilt is like a crushing boulder upon your head, squeezing you down and down. Shame is like that, but worse, because you could feel distrust coming from all sides and that what others feel is caused only by you.

Where you want to find a hole and bury yourself in it. For a bit. Just until it goes away so that you can return to your former comforts of simplicity and predictability.

But of course, you can’t. Because if you were looking at yourself from the outside, you would not look at the behavior in a positive light. In a scornful voice, you might even say, “I would never do that”. And you laugh at the wimp, the coward, the meekless soul.

And because you think of that, you bite your lip and face the world headon. Because of course, you know that everyone forgets. Often too quickly.