I was rushing. Having not checked my email all day, I realized the meeting was at 6 pm. But I had to finish the last parts of my project. Okay, quick, send it out. I pressed send and spun in my chair. Bathroom.

Grabbing my stuff, I pattered down to the stairs. The elevator was broken. I let myself run down free…with slight caution. I was afraid of falling.

It was already 6:10 pm. I decided that I would just get there and deal my indecision of attending later.

On the way, I made two phone calls. A followup to Noah. He didn’t pick up. I breathlessly left a message. Then another to my sister. I set my phone to silent, not wanting it to bother me.

Passing by 5th street, I hesitated. I could just go home…I wouldn’t make it on time anyway. Nobody would miss me.

But I already planned to attend. And so I walked briskly down Mission, then down 3rd.

I saw knots of people unfurling, spilling out of buildings in waves. Then the small trickle that followed. The ones that came from small companies—small droplets rolling up to Market to catch the bus, the trolley, the train home.

I arrived, the building with huge glass windows. One inside current.tv with huge tvs meant to showcase the dynamism…the speed…there were so many people chattering inside.

The webpage said they were on the 4th floor. I hesitated, walking around in a circle. It was 6:45 pm. Now or never. I glanced at the nearby light rail. The AT&T Park. Nobody will notice if I walked and got on the train, whisking me back to my former destiny. I will be an ant like all the ants.

No.

And so I forced myself to call. “Yes I am here for the meeting. I am downstairs. Sorry I am so late, I hope it’s not over yet.”

A few moments later, I gave a sheepish smile sitting down in the glass conference room with all unfamiliar faces. I took a breath and settled in.