10 years ago and then 10 years later

10 years ago…
It was December 31, 1999.

I was still in high school at Acalanes, only halfway through my senior year. That year, I suddenly realized that everything was going to be different…for the better. I had hope.

It was before I decided that I wanted to record everything. Back then, I shunned the idea of a diary.

I was sheltered. Only recently had I began meeting people online. I made one single friend that I actually intrinsically valued. I didn’t understand drugs, alcohol or music.

I thought I was going to be a computer scientist and make a lot of money. Even though I wanted to be a writer. I had applied to only four colleges: UC Berkeley, UCLA, UCSD and UC Davis. Despite pretty good grades and “above average” SAT scores…and an incredibly reflective essay, I didn’t think of applying to private colleges knowing that no teachers would recommend this shy, quiet, nearly mute girl.

On that night, my sister and I were downstairs watching the countdown on MTV. Sure, it was 3 hours behind, but that day I learned what the top 100 music videos of the 90s were. I don’t remember the top music video, but all I knew when it counted down…the 2000s were supposed to be better.

10 years later…

I have lived in San Francisco for three years and am working as an user experience designer since 2006. Some say it’s a highly coveted field. I have my bachelors from Berkeley and a masters from Carnegie Mellon.

I record everything and am a fan of social media. Shamelessly, I almost use every social network out there. I have a blog and am thinking of starting a few more.

I know a lot of people in San Francisco, particularly those in design or are hipsters. And I know more people IRL than I know online than in the middle of the 2000s. I understand my goals now. I understand what I don’t like. And it’s getting easier to deal with those quandaries that come up everyday.

I am working today and tomorrow. My coworker told me that I was Miss Popular when she asked me what I was doing tonight. Party-hopping, I said. I am heading to three parties, not because I will get bored. But because I don’t want to miss the opportunity of meeting new people.

There’s something about the next 10 years that is exciting. Having settled into work life, I am suddenly now at an impasse. I am looking for a change. To reinvent myself. To find happiness.

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