I had my last lecture of the semester today! Now two weeks of studying for finals. Starting Monday the 15th, 3 finals in all within 24 hours.

When I was 11, I wrote in a now-defunct diary about how I wished I was really smart.

And so here I am in UC Berkeley 10 years later. The irony is that now I wish I sometimes wasn\’t.

I am never pulling an all-nighter again. Everytime, I do one it\’s for a computer science class. And every time I finish the project and look outside to see that night as turned into dawn to morning, I feel a feeling of sickness come over me.

Then I watch my buddy list re-populate itself with people on the East Coast waking up while I still call it sleeping late.

I pulled an all-nighter, but I can\’t even sleep.

I am not busy, I am occupied!

I used to use that phrase a lot a few years ago, mostly because the word busy never fully captured the extent of what I was doing. Plus, it is a four letter word.

To me, the word busy implies I am too busy for you, almost like a backwards insult. It seems like you don\’t have your balance of priorities straightened. Being occupied indicates that it is unfortunate that you are unavailable to do something and you feel regretful that you cannot do that something. Alas, the contextual implications.

So this week, I am occupied with two projects, impending finals, grad school applications (somehow I neglected to realize that some schools require a portfolio-how did this happen!), a presentation tomorrow (because i got out of it Monday due to my voice), lo-fi prototype studies, attending office hours, certain obligations, etc.!