I forgot that most people don\’t really know their boundaries. Why is it that I always keep mine and other people don\’t?

It was one of those unwanted nights when a debate went longer than it should. A conflict of some sort. So today, I woke up with a puffy left eye. Bad karma, perhaps?

Although it doesn\’t take into full account everything that was said last night, what had bothered me the most was this person\’s perception of volunteering that by volunteering to help out the disadvantaged, we are only further encouraging them to get things for free. Apparently he\’s quite the capitialist at a tender age of 20. Disadvantaged people tend to have many setbacks-learning disablitieis, mental problems, etc. They are not getting stuff for \”free\”. Of course, there a few that abuse it, but still. I volunteer at the Job Consortium and this is where we help people get back on their feet. He said, a waste of time. why help those who cannot help themselves? Good point, selfish little boy! I paraphrase this part: I am in a race. There are those who get water breaks all the time. [here he\’s alluding to \”rich kids\”] I don\’t get water breaks. I get hit by a bat every so often. Yet I still manage to be in the top 5. Do I really want to stop to help those who have fallen down to get back up?

——

I wish I was at the big game! The year that I was born 1982…was when the play happened. In high school, the week before the Big Game all the teachers from Cal and Stanfurd would dress in yellow/blue and red, respectively. You could sense a happy competitive spirit in the air. I would go to my calculus class to be greeted by a red shirt then I would go to my gov\’t class where my teacher would be streaming yellow and blue all over the classroom.

Edit: CAL WON. tee hee! bears over those trees! 28 to 16, BEARS! We\’re going to the BOWL!

Did these awhile ago from here. Most things didn\’t work on me! Not even the large Mexican hats.

The only thing that looked remotely normal was me as a Japanese teenager. Or a punker. Or a someone with really straight hair.

Participate in this psych study! No compensation though, but you\’re helping some poor psych students!

And in other news, this is the second time I have been hijacked with the dot com toolbar, which really irritates me. It keeps misdirecting me to random websites. Imagine the future full of advertisements. How will computer n00bies deal with this? Especially since the majority don\’t know what the word spyware is especially when it means not using Kazaa. Imagine a future where we would be getting constant ads on our cellphone just because we are walking downtown. And how search engines aren\’t going to be useful anymore because companies spend millions in order to get their rank up up up in the air.

I have been blind for all this week. In fact, right now I can\’t even see what I am writing. Somehow last weekend, I accidentally left my glasses at home and so have to wear my contacts in order to see (I am very very very nearsighted-the only person that can beat my nearsightedness is ALECKY). So my habits of staying up late are firing back. My eyes start burning once it\’s past 11 pm. Can\’t wait until I can see after dark.

Today in my User Interfaces class, we discussed the social implications of friendster. Sniff, my dream come true! In fact, most of what the instructor said came from my previous observations-interaction of people, how there are no level of friendships (close friends are treated the same as acquaintances).

And what\’s more, she also talked about moblogging. That is, people blogging from cellphones and other mobile devices. But the function of moblogging is so that people can know instantaneously what is happening where and when.

For example chasing Bush around the UK. Now that\’s what I call stalking. <3 <3 <3!

\”You know how you make decisions that lead to other decisions but you don\’t remember why you made those decisions in the first place.\” – from Better Luck Tomorrow

Suddenly, I realize that\’s how I have been living the last few years of my life. If if everything is going wrong, some good came out of it. For example, the son of a farmer breaks his leg and cannot work in the fields anymore. Then a war starts in a distinct land and they recruit all the able-bodied young people. The son is not allowed to go. All the young people die, but the son lives.

After my data structures class the fall of my sophomore year, I thought I would never have to pull another all-nighter again in Soda Hall…doing a computer science project/homework.

And how I was very wrong. Yesterday I entered the lab at 7:30 pm and did not leave almost 10 hours later at 5 am. It wasn\’t that I procrastinated (although I can always appease myself believing that my lack of focus contributed to my loss of my sleep). These times in the computer lab are where you prove to yourself that you were never meant to be a computer science major (which I learned 2 years ago).

But it was nice walking back at 5. Knowing that some people were probably already waking up in the Central and Eastern time zones. Seeing nobody on campus, but feel that chill wind through the buildings with a few lighted rooms (surely it must be a graduate student who did not want to leave to sleep). Then watching the traffic lights blink yellow and flash red as I cross the street, careful knowing that Berkeley police are always finding reasons to give jaywalking tickets.

Something to miss about Berkeley, maybe.

It has been one year since my first photolog (on November 14, 2002), which was formerly started at the community positively.cpnet then has spread to the protag community.

And so thus, I present my latest photolog!

One of the first scenes in Double Happiness was of a Chinese family at the dinner table. The children were speaking to each other in English, using some popular culture words. The parents kept shouting at each other in Chinese, Are they speaking bad words?! Stop that! What horrible children we have!!!

I was at my grandmother\’s apartment today helping her with some technical stuff. She wanted me to teach her how to program the VCR to make a timed recording. So I did. I explained it all in broken Chinese. Apparently she didn\’t understand what I was saying. She didn\’t know the difference between up/down buttons (which you use to increment) and the left/right buttons (which you use to go from one field to the next). So I also had to help her with her computer. Because she doesn\’t know how to read English that well, she had a on-screen reader. It would read aloud in a mechanical male voice anything that the mouse was hovering over. And, I just had to read Rekuytn\’s e-mail (who had another one of his crazy ideas and would rather e-mail me than call me) there and as I clicked on the subject a loud male voice shouted, Masturbathon!

Fortunately, my parents and my grandmother were quite oblivious.

Ugh. I remember how I got easily sick from food my freshman year of college. Deciding to be random, I decided that I would buy lunch for myself today. I ate a chicken pita sandwich at the restaurant two blocks from my apartment. And now about 3 hours later, I feel oddly sick. Stomachache. Is it from the food? Is it from undue stress? Or is it because I am wearing…TIGHT PANTS?