December 23 – New Name

Let’s meet again, for the first time. If you could introduce yourself to strangers by another name for just one day, what would it be and why?

When I was young, it was the name Rachel. There’s a reason why my sister calls me Ranch to this day. I stopped using that name when my youngest cousin was given that same name.

But now, if it’s a new name, it would need to have some of edge. To be slightly quirky. To be slightly masculine. Would it be Mitsuko—the crazed girl from Battle Royale. Or Andy…of my favorite name Andrea.

December 20 – Beyond Avoidance. What should you have done this year but didn’t because you were too scared, worried, unsure, busy or otherwise deterred from doing?

It wasn’t just 2010. It was the same goal in 2009.

Back when I first saw Randy Pausch’s The Last Lecture, I told myself that I would achieve my childhood dream of writing. And I don’t just mean writing in this blog. My excuse for years has always been that I had writer’s block. That when I was 10 years old, suddenly my mind changed and the flow of creativity disappeared in a snap. Lighting.

Realistically, it was probably just my brain growing as my logical side took over. I excelled in logical things—solving problems. Math and science.

And yet, that creative side of me has been screaming all this time and I have been looking for a way to quell it.

2010 was supposed to be the year that I wrote something…and sent in a submission somewhere. The New York Times Modern Love column?

On my trip to Hong Kong and Vietnam last year, I started writing something in a large blank book that I got for that purpose. But I never finished. I started it—I looked at and as the plane rumbled on and on…I blamed headaches, nausea…

And I never returned to it.

2011. I’ll try this time. Especially since there are clear submission guidelines now. But yes, the topic first.

December 19 – Healing. What healed you this year? Was it sudden, or a drip-by-drip evolution? How would you like to be healed in 2011?

If this was 2006—the year that changed everything, then I would have a better answer. Back then, it was hearts, bones, and lack of life.

But 2010?

I usually never win. It was the spirit of trying to succeed all these years…and finally winning at something that healed. It was a drip-by-drip evolution perhaps, but I realized that I still had the skill and ability. And that’s all that matters.

December 18 – Try. What do you want to try next year? Is there something you wanted to try in 2010? What happened when you did / didn’t go for it?

In 2011: Travel with Chris internationally.

In 2010: I wanted to submit a writing piece or film piece. In some way, I am not sure why I didn’t. I can easily blame my job for taking away a lot of my motivation or enthusiasm. Or was it the lack of time, especially after I returned home from work? Whatever it was, I am trying to solve this soon.

December 17 – Lesson Learned. What was the best thing you learned about yourself this past year? And how will you apply that lesson going forward?

Carefully consider your travel partner.

I said this before, but the company determines all your experiences.

When traveling, it’s important to consider the person you’ll travel with. They must share your same energy levels, same expectations, same comfort levels, and openness to new things. And most importantly, when everyone is lost, you are going to work together.

My roommate last year said that he learned whether a relationship would last based on how well he traveled with them. It’s true. Like how you learn a lot about someone in an hour of play, you learn an lifetime about someone from a day of travel.

December 16 – Friendship. How has a friend changed you or your perspective on the world this year? Was this change gradual, or a sudden burst?

Ta-ching.

In my more college era, I would have taken more drastic measures. But after those years, I had taken a vow to be more mature and more logical.

I remember more than 8 years ago when I questioned why people kept friends who were “annoying”. Why? When they have nothing to give you except grief? I learned from this friend that there’s always something.

Some may call me methodical, but I believe that everyone has something to give whether it’s something tangible or nontangible. It is cold, but there is some use for each person.

The change though was that I realized that even at my age, there are still some people who don’t see the world as I see it. In the way that I have a desire to please. That I don’t want to tread on others’ ambitions and needs.

This is what I learned.