I did not know that I had committed a major faux pas today.

In Japan, give a business card with both hands as if delivering a package.

I am going to the Geek Spring Break as the blogosphere likes to call it aka the South by Southwest Festival in Austin, Texas from March 6 to March 12.

Of course, going for the Interactive portion. Too bad, I don’t have the credentials to stay for the music festival. <3 <3 <3 the Pillows!

Someone once told me, “You’re lucky.”

And yet, am I? What is luck? To bet on the odds and yet still win? To take the risks and benefit much?

Or is it because I took the time to carefully analyze my choices and decide with diligence? Or because there are so many near misses and I just happen to still survive?

Or is it because I am paranoid when I leave my apartment always checking for three things—wallet, keys, and phone. Without keys, I cannot get inside. Without a phone, I cannot call for help. Without a wallet, I cannot identify myself, put something down as collateral, or bribe someone to help me get my keys or phone.

A few years ago in Pittsburgh in my bedroom on the top floor of a 3 story townhouse, the doorbell rang as I was sleeping. 3 am or so. It was ringing incessantly. I stumbled downstairs past my other roommates and opened the door in a half-asleep state. I opened the front door and my roommate came in, profusely apologizing for being locked out. I stumbled back upstairs to go back to sleep.

Even my parents know.

Even my grandparents know.

About the Edison Chen sex scandal.

At dinner Monday (at Peony, of course), my parents gestured toward a woman reading a Chinese tabloid and shook their head in disappointment.

What is surprising to me is: 1. who had so much vengeance to post the photos all over the Internet? 2. why did edison chen decide to keep pictures of his sexual escapades? furthermore, why did he have to take pictures almost as trophies?

Besides that, he has a weird name. Knowing that he’s from Hong Kong, I hope his parents didn’t choose the name for him. Most likely, he probably chose his own English name when he was of age.

Fortunately, my parents didn’t choose a random English word for their English names.

My photo below is going to featured in the Chicago schmap!

But it’s just a picture of food, not like a greatest piece of my art in photography.

“So I use this eye cream because I really get eye circles,” she said. “It really helps! I love it.”

They continued talking about their nighttime regime going through products from Clinique and MAC. The eye cream to get rid of wrinkles and eye circles. The lotion that had SPF because that was very important. I sat there quietly, trying not to panic. Drinking my tea that had cooled. One sip at a time.

Angie turned to me and asked, “So what do you use?”

In the Girl Scouts right before high school, the troop decided that to work on the beauty badge. We went around the circle talking about our facial regime. Some talked about the special facial wash they used. Others talked about their mom teaching them how to use facial scrub. A mud mask. I was silent as usual but was panicking inside. I didn’t know what I was supposed to say. I had no idea and couldn’t make up something on the spot.

When it was my turn, I said, “I use soap.”

A year later, I got acne and stopped using regular bar soap for facial cleansing.

Now more than 13 years later, the same question faced me. I decided that I wanted to admit how clueless I was in regards to beauty. And how when I purchased foundation last weekend, my cheeks slightly reddened when the saleslady asked me what I used and I hesitated because I never owned foundation before and the saleslady must have thought Uh…isn’t she a little too old to be so clueless? and I asked questions like how are you supposed to put that on and how do you clean the brush spending an additional $45 that I am going to return tomorrow.

Angie must have noticed my hesitation and answered for me.

She then said, “I think I asked you once and you chirped, ‘I use soap!'”

As a youngling, my parents often spoke for me. As a result, I am still timid when I have to speak up in a unfamiliar situation. And sometimes I never say anything at all.

And yet for Chris, as a youngling, his mom never let him speak. As a result, he always speaks. Perhaps even before thinking. He attributes to the fact that he always wanted to speak.

I got a watch for the recent holiday.

Even though I said that I don’t like watches, because I have a habit of checking the time if it’s readily available and making people anxious around me.

But what if there was a time that I didn’t want to be tracked by evil people. So I couldn’t use my cell phone. What if I wanted to go…black. I guess I would need a watch to tell my allies that we are about to set the bomb off in exactly 60 seconds.

“I have bad news,” he said the moment I got into the car.

Immediately, I started thinking of all the scenarios that could possibly happen:

1. I have cancer.

2. My leg is going to be amputated.

3. I have been accused of being a terrorist.

4. They found me.

5. I got another parking ticket.

6. I have been banned from the Internet.

7. I need to sell my car.

8. Your house is on fire.

9. I accidentally smashed your computer.

10. Your bed fell apart.

The first thing that came out of my mouth was, “You’re breaking up with me?!?!?!?!?!??!”

Fortunately it wasn’t any of the above.

Just that his mom was coming into town…

(Which translates as: she will take up my entire weekend so all our plans to go to Half Moon Bay are canceled)

“Sometimes he feels bad that someone has spent a lot of money on something he can easily find for half the price,” I explained. “And sometimes I feel that way too.”

My coworker was slightly appalled at the comment. “But a gift is a gift. It’s free!” he exclaimed.

It took me several hours to really understand what he meant. Because to me, a gift isn’t simply the physical object. It’s the effort and the thought put into finding the gift. No offense to those well-intentioned friends (of course, I always appreciate the gesture), but I have received many gifts that have been misinterpreted for me. Soaps, perfumes, etc….when they don’t know that my feminine side is purely undeveloped and I don’t care too much about those little things.

Finding the right price is often part of the journey and the fun of purchasing things. Ebay? Amazon? Craigslist? That obscure online game store? Others? Coupons? Fatwallet? Gotapex? Black friday?

Several years ago, I was so proud of the fact that I got season one of 24 for less than $15. And yet could I feel ok giving that as a gift? That I spent less than the usual market value? Would I feel obligated to spend more?

What is the value?

For Chris’ birthday, I wanted to buy him the special Target edition of Transformers. The one with the DVD case that transforms. Unfortunately I read online that the DVDs had sold out. And I had read that the day of the sale. So rather than running to the nearest Target, I went on craigslist to search for anybody selling the Target edition. I decided that I would be willing to pay a little more for the limited edition from someone who was trying to make a profit. So I got the new packaged DVD (after a sketchy exchange). Chris was thrilled, except that we found out later that Target did not sell out and the price was steadily dropping. He always felt guilty that I paid over-market price, but to me…at the time, it was the happiness that I got it in time.

Diamonds is a girl’s best friend, but I am also fine with CZ.